Turning 17 now, Dad is continuously pressuring me to pull my weight and cost in this family, my oldest sister, which my dad might slightly love more than the rest of his children, is of no f☆cking help at all related to my newfound adulthood/college preparation,  my mom's a stay-at-home mom that cleans everything, which means I don't have chores(AKA discipline), and I have no other guidance to help me besides my own.

(No offense to my family members.  I love you guys, but you did not prepare me at all to survive on my own.)

Just finishing my resume in order to apply for a place my sister works at - and the job is totally not what I want.
"Too bad, so sad," right?  
"It's the working world, Mai, stop complaining!"
I know, I know...but I'd want a place I'd like to work at ALRIGHT?! I know I'm going to be in a bad mood if I'm doing something I don't atleast mildly like.

I'd be okay with a library owned by the state, but I don't think they pay their workers!  (I lerv reading...j/kit'sforthemanga)...Do they volunteer?

Michael's Arts & Crafts was a choice because I'd always buy my art supplies there.  I applied online and was never contacted.  (To be honest, my application was crappy anyway).

Another place I thought of applying for was Barnes & Noble!  I only wanted to work there because it looked like you didn't really need to have a lot of social skills,  (ME BEING THE SHYEST, QUIETEST, AND MOST AWKWARD THING ON THE F☆☆KING PLANET) and they sold manga! LOL (I decided this at like 15 okay).


well den, how about jobs related directly to art?

Commissions - Well, here's where I'm SOL.
-My page barely gets views and it feels like my watchers are asleep most of the time.  I average about 1 comment per deviation, and sometimes, it's even my own.
-GOOD art I've made is usually from inspiration that's hit me at 3 AM in the morning, when I am probably the most sleep-deprived and have the lowest of basic energy. CURSE DAT INSOMNIA/HYPOGLYCEMIA/DISORDERS I THINK I HAVE...!

How the hell am I supposed to get a job without a degree, much less, as an adolescent that still hasn't graduated high school?  

Life is tough when you start to grow up.  Being babied and spoon-fed my whole life hasn't helped one bit so far.

Overall, this journal is pretty negative.  But don't you worry!  I'm going to sort it out (: I am going to get a job somehow and I AM GOING TO F☆☆CKING LIKE IT!

Wish me luck ~

This is just an update journal about my status in life

Recently I've been into a lot of vocaloid music, if you wanna see my PILING PLAYLIST ON YOUBUTE: [link] the music at the bottom is slightly better than the ones at the beginning of the playlist because of my crappy start of making a playlist
dont judge me ლ(ಠ益ಠლ) IVE HAD THE SAME MUSIC FOR TWO YEARS
Because of that medley niconicosamurai0320 made, I was introduced to Rolling Girl (no offense intended but the song sounds a bit better on guitar ♡ ) which led to Crime & Punishment and old songs i never got around to exploring; heat-haze days (96neko:YES.)

About Cosplay:
I pushed some to next year because I'd be able to buy the fabric for them with my non-existent monies ♡.
Gosh,  don't you just love cosplay? Thinking about it, I mean.
It just gets me inspired thinking about how awesome its gonna turn out to be.
Me and my friend are planning to attend AM2 (Anime Expo 2) this summer ([link])
Tickets are about $10 and we're planning to go all three days.  I THINK IT'S IN AUGUST OR SOME SHITAKE MUSHROOMS friend can't keep me updated ლ(ಠ_ಠლ)

I keep changing my mind gosh @_@ JACK, DANNY PHANTOM, FENTON, DIPPER PINES,...HOMESTUCK...?? (which has over 100 likable characters x_x),
I'm just going to flip a table to solve my problems.

asdfalsjb

Btw, can someone explain to me this song? [link]
I wasn't paying attention half the time and I'm sure it has a deeper meaning than what I see

Sadly, I just heard Trickster Online shut down.  It was an old game I used to play in middle school, a game I didn't play enough of.  I feel bad for all those people who played it daily because I remember walking into the town and having it just FILLED with people afking with their shops.  They're all going to have nothing to do now.  There's a throbbing void left in their hearts now.  You can never come by another original game like Trickster Online again.

I am going to miss trickster so much, even though I didn't play it a lot (HYPOCRITICAL MODE, ACTIVATE.)  Now that I think about it, it was a pretty decent game for its type; 3-D/2-D implication, not to mention, the most cutest shounen art ever drawn (game art, not actual gameplay), that bird's eye camera view kind of mode, endless elements waiting to be experienced...oh gosh

ANOTHER VIRTUAL GEM GONE DOWN THE DRAIN -FAINTS-

Trickster Online is one of only games I actually liked, it didn't force you to be technical and pimp your sh!t out unless you wanted to, you actually would've survived on your own regardless.  I only job I played really was the bunny boxer ): oh gosh
I hope it's not gone forever though. Come back trickster, come back...

(To the tune of Baby Come Back)
♪ TRICKSTER COME BACK....
 ANY KIND OF GAMER COULD SEE...
 THERE WAS SOMETHING IN...EVERYTHING ABOUT YOOOU ♪

♪ BABY COME BACK
 YOU CAN BLAME IT ON ECONOMY
 I WAS INACTIVE, AND NOW I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOOOOOOOU ♪

♪   NOW THAT YOU'RE GONE...! </3...
............................................................

Sigh.
I cry at night everytime before I sleep now.

Cry with me Trickster Players, don't you wish it came back?

dammit
going to upload tribute soon